may to august 2013, chapter one.

how on earth have I not written since may? do I start where I left off? or do I start where I am and reference back? and why have I not written for so long?
to begin with, it seems that I don't find myself writing during the summer months like I did during the colder months.

it could also be that since the middle of may, I have had a series of mishaps... started with injuring my knee. then a breast biopsy. then a carpel tunnel flare up. then rolling my foot and cracking a bone. all on top of fibromyalgia flares thanks to the warm/hot weather. I have been in either a splint, a soft cast, using a cane or crutches since mid may. I am getting very very very tired of this added pain and inconvenience.
the good news is that this summer has also been filled with lots of fun, rest and adventures.

let me start with memorial day weekend. and then move to the end of school. summer camp. teaching summer camp. trip to Alaska. friend visit. home. summer camp. home. home. teaching summer camp and topped off with a few days at the beach. and finish with how this summer fits into my theory of simple living for a rich life.

like many of my friends, I had a very best friend all the way through high school. not to say that I didn't have many super good friends as well. but, this gal and I hit it off the first week of high school and are still good friends. i was able to connect with her via facebook a number of years ago. and have continued our friendship from many years ago. i was invited to her wedding over memorial day weekend. like many of us, she was getting married for the second time. i hadn't been able to go to her first wedding and was determined to make it to this one. from a small mountain town in California to Houston Texas! this was the first time i had a weekend without my son since i adopted him, nearly 7 years ago. i was so excited about having a weekend solo, traveling to a city i had never been before, meeting her fiancé and spending time with my friend of nearly 40 years. the weekend couldn't have been better. my mom and son took me to the airport early Saturday morning. i managed to get myself through the airport hobbling with a brace on my knee. realized i hadn't flown in a long time...

security procedures had changed quite a bit! thank goodness i had easy shoes to take on and off, and had packed my cpap machine in a small carry on bag. what an ordeal. finally got to the gate, where an attendant looked at me and asked if i might want a wheelchair at the other end to take me to my ride. oh my goodness, why didn't i think of that!!! here i was with a torn meniscus, bursitis of the knee and fibromyalgia and i didn't think of asking for help. not me, miss independent. well, i must say having a wheelchair at the other end ready to take me to my ride was a blessing. i was from now on going to ask for that assistance.

whether you speak of the spoon theory, or simply you just have x amount of energy and you want to use it wisely... a wheelchair is a blessing. i found my ride and drove to her house. we screamed in delight, seeing each other after 25+ years. realizing that we may have changed a bit physically, grown intellectually, and blossomed emotionally, but really were just the same as we were years ago. same laugh, same facial expressions, same energy. it was so wonderful.

well, without going into extreme detail, i can say that this was one of the most beautiful weddings ever. they got married in front of their fireplace in their living room. and had their reception in their backyard. a collaboration of friends created every detail of this celebration, from the amazing food, to the beautiful tables, to the twinkling lights. what a celebration of love, friendship and life. other than the obvious thrill it was for me to reunite with my best friend from high school, the emotion of hope filled the air, that yes, even in your fifties you can find your soul mate who will travel the next chapter of your journey with you. i am so thrilled for the two of them!!

next chapter for me was to get home, do as much physical therapy as i could to get my pain levels under control. as well as finish out my son's first grade year of school. during this last week of school, the big decision of where he should attend next year was on the table. realizing that he needed special services specifically for the ptsd/anxiety he deals with from the first year of life with his birth mother. there were options, yes options. in this little town, the special ed department is amazing. it wasn't until the day before school ended that we decided that he would go to the school in the next town so that he could attend special ed for half of the day, and immersion the other half of the day. he would be bussed from our front door! and it was clearly the best choice for him. the downside is that we both had made friends at this school and now were faced with having to start all over.

shortly after i returned from Houston, i had my normal follow up mammogram. and darn it all, it had an abnormality... nothing new for me. i have had 2 biopsy surgeries  and 3 aspirations, but this one really scared me. first time on the left side. first time i couldn't feel the lump. first time a new technique was going to be done. a stereotactic biopsy. thankfully i was able to schedule it while my son was in summer camp the following week. dang, this was not how i wanted to start my summer vacation.

every time i have had an abnormality, i have taken an inventory of my life. what was i doing, what did i want to do differently, how could i simplify. what i learned from this round was there really wasn't anything i would change. imagine that!! i really love my life. what an amazing gift to receive from this "bad news". i knew that if the results came back "cancer" i would fight like hell! and beat it!! i knew that i could put in place a care team for myself and my son. i knew it was going to be ok. and it was. no cancer.

whew! the next chapter of the summer was to teach my most favorite group of girls; sewing, baking and cake decorating. but before we could leave on this adventure, i had to pack for this week and 10 days of traveling afterwards, clean my house so friends could enjoy it while we were gone and organize doggie care for the duration. these projects took an amazing amount of energy. by the time we actually left i was already exhausted, but i was thrilled my house was clean! we were packed! and i had my dog sitter lined up. after 5 days of teaching... i drove back up to the mountains to drop off our dog. six hours of driving in the hot sun... but alone with the music on was a mixed blessing. now all i had to do was to wake up at 5am to start our vacation adventure.

how does this all fit in to 'simple living'? i realized that during the school year, i am very thrifty. we live where there isn't a lot of places to spend money. the local yarn/book store gets most of my shopping!! as well as the thrift store. by having a very lean budget we are able to live on quite little, and that allows me to save some for travel during the summer. simple living for 9 months for a very rich 3 months of vacation, that suits me very well!! and has started a new way of looking at my budget for me. i don't mind being thrifty in order to have adventures! it really sums up what i was going after by moving up here. simple living isn't about depriving yourself. but being mindful of how you spend your money, with whom you spend your money with and why you are spending it. we eat at home for the majority of our meals. we go out very rarely for meals. i tend to like what i make better than most restaurants. and it makes going out very special. we don't have any fast food joints in our town. so when i treat my son to fast food, two towns away, it is a huge treat. same with coffee.... the closest starbucks is two towns away. and pete's is miles and miles away. years ago i thought i couldn't go a day without my "coffee". what i realized is that i was spending a ton of money on a hot drink i could make from home for pennies.
nobody cares up here if you are wearing a hundred dollar pair of sweats, or 14k gold earrings, or $100 sneakers. i can wear my $5 pair of sweats, a tee shirt from the thrift store and earrings that i make, and fit in just fine. do you have any idea how much money that saves each month??? let's talk about cars!! the best car up here is an old suv, 4 wheel drive. you don't want a new one because you are likely going to run into  a deer, tree branches, snowpiles, or something within the first winter up here. during the spring and summer, your car has sap, pine needles, dirt and dust on it. and who cares???? so that cks off food, clothing and transportation. and saves a ton of money!!

to be continued....

trailer part 3

I barely slept last night waiting and worrying about what I had done to my car. I had asked my local friends for referrals as to who to call. One of those items you don't think about until you have to when you have moved to a new area. The mechanic that was on the top of everyone's list didn't answer... I left a message and then called again. He had a one week wait for service but he steered me towards the only other mechanic on the hill who has transmission expertise. I called him asap. So nice and understanding when I explained what had happened. He said he would come by at lunchtime, pick up my car and deliver it before the day was done. OMG how wonderful!!!! He did just as he said and was on time! that never happens up here!!

So here is the good news. When a ford explorer's transmission fluid becomes too hot, there is a release valve that dumps the fluid out. Yes, all over my driveway! The best scenario is when you can drain the transmission, fill it up again with fluid and it runs smoothly. Yes, this is what he did and it does run smoothly. Great news!!!!

I asked my mechanic, yes, my mechanic as I have found the one who I will go to from now on.....
would he be willing to ck out my car and see if anything else needs to be worked on. I was set up to see him back on Monday.

It felt so good to have someone take a look thru my car. Well the good news is that I didn't need a new transmission. The bad news is that I did need a new radiator, front brakes, and two new tires.
Schedule for the following day.

My son and I arrived at the mechanic's after school. We set up camp with snacks, the ipad, a few good books and comfy chairs and waited... and waited.... and waited... for the work to be done.
Additional parts needed to be ordered and driven up the hill... but by 5pm. all was done!!

All of this unexpected repair had cost a lot of money... I made the decision that instead of camping the following weekend, we would stay home. Up here the county fair is a really big deal!! and school is out for the duration of the fair. We had a 5 day weekend when no one else does. What a prime time to go away! This year though we would go to the fair, spend time at home, relax, garden, have park playdates and relax some more. It was a glorious 5 day stay-cation.

p.s. The trailer is still in our driveway waiting for it's first camping trip this summer. My car is driving well. And the two new tires will be put on tomorrow. All is well.

trailer. part 2.

oh, it felt so good to cool down and fall asleep. it had been such a long hot day....

i had the daunting task of moving the trailer this morning. juiced up on two cups of coffee, got my courage up and went outside. now, it should be fairly easy to back the trailer up the driveway, right?

started up my car and put it in reverse. oh lordy, not so easy. the car groaned and groaned. i couldn't get enough momentum to push it up the hill. so i cleared out my carport and drove it back down until
my car was in the carport. this should give me some more steam...ok push!!!

it is so hard to both push my trailer up the hill and get it where I want it. so afraid it was going to jack knife. ok, I am giving up on this idea... especially since I am smelling something burning... I decided that I would try to just move the trailer to a spot that I can unhitch it and still be able to move my car around and out of the driveway.

another half hour passes and still no success. at this point I decide I better go and get my next door neighbor to try to help me. at least he is another set of eyes and can get me lined up better. on our way to get him, he comes out his door wanting to know what is burning?? he opens the hood of my car and cks the oil, no it is just fine. now the transmission fluid, oh my the dip stick is smoking... oh what have I done????

we decide one more push up the hill. he helps me get lined up right and steers me in the right direction. success!!!! I am up the hill!!! I drive around the block and he helps me back the trailer down the driveway. success!!! we unhitch the trailer and they it has sat for the last 2 weeks!!

back to the car. we both know I have done damage... but to what extent??? nothing I can do today about it. nothing is open on sunday up here. nothing to do but wait til tomorrow....

trailer. part 1.

finally, I have a chance to sit down at my computer and write. when you don't see updated posts you can be sure that my life is not simple during that time. all sorts of projects that were meant to be simple or simplify became far more complicated.

1. little camping trailer...

my son and I explored an rv land on the way home from the bay area a month or so ago. we discovered we really liked the tent trailers but didn't want the netting as the barrier between us
and the wildlife that lives near us. I loved the fact that I could see behind me when towing... I
remembered that years ago, I saw a "tent trailer" that had hard sides. It popped up like a chalet...
so after the weekend of rv shopping, I went online and found one of those trailers... a 94. priced at
about half of what it was worth. I called asap. and found out that it was in fresno and had been
traded in the day before by the original owner. within a day, I put down a deposit on it. it would
be ready for pick up in a week or so. being that fresno is about 3 hours away, a Saturday was our
only possibility.
finally that Saturday arrived, we woke up early, got in our suv and drove off. I knew we had the type
of hitch needed, yeh!! so easy pick up... when we got there we ckd it all out. met my expectations!!
we drove over to the service department to get "hitched". we discovered that yes, the hitch was right,
but the electrical that worked the brake lights and blinkers was missing... "missing!!?" oh my goodness, did not expect that. the mechanic wasn't so happy with us either. he said to "sit", and
he would try to get it working... 5 hours later, after sitting in the 100 degree sun in the service bay,
without food- just a few vending machine treats, he said "let me go get the damages". holy cow,
what was this going to cost me?.... he came back wanting to know what I had done, the boss was
going to comp the whole bill. near to tears, I hugged him. don't think he has been hugged in awhile!!
the other guys sort of lined up, I think all hoping for hugs as well... I didn't hug them all.
we were finally on our way. oh crap! I am pulling this huge trailer, or at least felt like it. they had
drained my battery while working on my car, so I couldn't turn off the engine and we were so
thirsty we were about to drop. so I did what any other trailer hauling mom would do, I drove thru
the drive thru!! we ordered lots of drinks... and drove off our merry way.
driving down the 99, is like driving down a dirt road after a rainstorm, bumpy bumpy bumpy..... now.
time for gas. found an easy station to pull off for. while we were at the pump, this dad looking guy
very embarrassed asked me if I could spare a few gallons... he had run out of gas, had two girls in the car, and didn't have any money left. feeling like I really needed to pay forward our free service bill, I said no problem and filled up a 4 gallon container for him. I don't think he was expecting ever to get
home that night. and off we went again.
I decided that I didn't want to go the twisty way, so we would drive to Manteca via 99 and then cut over east... shopping at target was my bribe to my son... we bought a few things for the trailer and headed off. hungry!!?? yes, as we drove thru the in and out burger drive thru. this one was tighter, but we made it!! I even asked the guy behind us if our lights were working, yes.
ok. now we are hot, tired, not hungry, and really ready to get home. knew we had another 2 hours to go. so I drove, and drove until a small car passed me and then stopped us at the stop sign... oh gosh, now what!? the stairs of the trailer had come down, and were about to scrape on the ground. thanks to the jiggling of hwy 99... fixed them. and drove off again. were we ever going to get home....
my biggest worry of this entire trip was how I was going to back down my driveway to get the trailer where it needed to be. by the time we got home, it was dark, my son was asleep and I decided to forget driving in reverse and just drove down the driveway. parked. turned off the engine. got my son. and went to bed. we would deal with it in the morning.....

seasons....

I am learning that we really have two seasons. October 15th - April 15th and April 15th - October 15th. During the Fall/Winter season, I was nudged to be more quiet, slower and introverted. All I wanted to do was to bake, cook, read and knit. I spent a lot of time finishing up home projects.
Building and caring for my nest. I thoroughly enjoyed this time.... felt so content just at home. I experienced for the first time, snow! The most beautiful wonderland. I couldn't believe how I was moved emotionally each time the snow fell. Pure bliss... until I had to shovel the driveway!!

We live in small home and in the winter it just seems cozy. The fire was on most of the time and we snugged down at night with pounds of covers on top of us. It was so hard to get up in the morning, especially when it was 17 degrees outside. No I don't have auto air or heat, just a propane fireplace which kept us warm all winter!! Wanted to be the mountain momma with a wooden stove, but decided I would rather be warm. Best money spent!!

Now it is April 25th, 10 days after the beginning of our spring/summer season. It is still cool in the morning, mid 40's, but warms up in the afternoon to low 70's. The sun is beginning to warm up the earth, the daffodils are blooming, the birds are singing; mother earth is waking up from winter and is stretching her arms and taking a big breath of fresh air!!

My desires are shifting to wanting to be out in the world. I have been visiting all of the shops that I know the owners of, been taking more exercise classes, and finding that my creative juices are beginning to flow easily... I have been moving my baking company from concept to reality! All things fresh and new are right in front of me everyday... I feel refreshed from my long winters rest.
Ready to move forward towards new beginnings....

One of the bonus benefits from living in the country is that if you are willing and able to... you can become a part of the natural process and cycle of the seasons. It feels so good to be in sync with mother earth. Thank for showing me how I can live as one with you.

april/may sponsorship.

Help preserve Yosemite -- Join hikers and backpackers of all abilities on Muir's

March July 28-Aug 3: www.hetchhetchy.org

 

thank you Kathy for your support!!

spring break

I started this post last week and was going to wait to finish it then post... but since it has taken me longer than expected, i am going to post what i have so far....

it is spring break for my son, and we are back in the bay area visiting my mom, friends and the beach.
i woke up this morning feeling like i had been run over by a mack truck so they say. i have been keeping us on our usual sleep schedule... but this morning, i had overslept by 3 hours!

i spent the day running errands while my mom watched my son. yesterday didn't phase me much, a trip to ikea and then to the park for a very long playdate. my son's best best friend is here and i wanted him to get as much "jax" time as he could.

today was a different story. no distraction of kids, catching up with friends. i was alone in my car dealing with the immense amount of traffic, noise, people, chaos, confusion and busyness. with blue tooths or cell phones attached to their ears, everyone seemed to be in a hurry to get somewhere important. hardly looking up to cross the street, these "people" all dressed up in their "work" clothes were moving at the speed of sound.

the air was filled with a sweet combination of a multitude of soaps and after shaves, with a hint of the perfume you would find at the counter of saks fifth avenue. i have not smelled so many fragrances all at once since i worked at macys next to the cosmetic department.

i was overwhelmed by the amount of stimulation that filled my body. the sights, the smells, the noise, the chaos, and yet i lived here for nearly my entire life before moving to the mountains. did i just not realize the intensity of this environment or did i try to shield it out for so many years?

more to follow.

morning air.

I find I get stuck in my house at times doing housework, blogging, crafting and such, and often don't go outside for hours, often not truly remembering where I live. This morning, I went outside with my son for his carpool ride. The morning air totally reminded me of where I live.
The sweet smell of pine, gentle breeze of cool fresh air and the sound of silence. I can't begin to share with you how wonderful it smells up here. Truly like a breath of fresh air. Clean, clean fresh air....
Yes, I remember where I am, it is called home.

so proud

I know this is not a big deal in the blogging world... but it is a big deal to me.

1005 views on my combined two blogs!! in 78 days.

thank you all. and keep reading!!

my favorite ranch...

these are pictures of my most favorite ranch. it is just outside columbia state park. love driving by there on the way to sonora. love how the colors change with the seasons.... i am still in awe every time i drive by... this time, i stopped and took pics!!

comfy!!

have no idea who this guy is, but i want one of these hammocks to hang from our trees!! looks so comfy!! anyone ever seen one?

more about the six spoons a day.

9.30
morning... not a restful one.

so, yesterday I used up 5 spoons and 2 large spoons, clearly that is more than 6. the last thing I did before bedtime was to write a couple of important emails. not a good idea. I was over tired and had my head spinning... didn't fall asleep until 3am-ish.

I was able to sleep in a little this morning by bribing my son with my phone to play on, but I am feeling like I am already down at least by 2 spoons today.

it will be interesting how much I actually get down on my wish list for sunday.
somethings will have to give, and hopefully it wont be me.

time for a very large cup of coffee....
----------------------
11.00
drank my coffee and had to re-evaluate the priorities of the day. laundry is for sure high on the list. the better organized I am going into a new week, the better. but laundry depletes me rather than filling me. so to counter balance, I am baking with my new mini bundt pans. baking always make me happy! while the cakes are in the oven, I am catching up on facebook and blogs. cakes should be out of the oven in a few minutes and while they are cooling I will begin the daunting task of getting our laundry organized. then lunch.

2.24
did the laundry, baked, did dishes, went to pick up our finds from the garage sale, grocery shopping, now home. have used up my spoons for the day. and am feeling it. so much for zumba, painting and gardening. rest of the day is about resting and relaxing. somewhere around 5.00 it will be dinner prep, bath time for my son and early to bed. it is already 4.04, so I think I can finish out the day!! my son told me that when I run out of spoons, I become mommy cranky pants... yup, that's me!!

7.02
clearly I need to save at least 2 spoons for between 4-8pm. getting dinner ready, my son bathed, in bed, wrap up the day, and in bed myself... takes 2 spoons. I try to get us in bed by 6.30. read until 7.00-7.30 and asleep soon after, especially on sunday night. but not tonight, my son is in the bath playing away... haven't finished up the day. and I am aiming for sleep by 8pm. wish me well.!!

so if I need to save 2 spoons for between 4-8pm. then I only have 4 during the day. how the heck am I suppose to get everything done??? no wonder I am always exhausted and mommy cranky pants by 4pm.

6 spoons a day lifestyle.

a friend was telling me about this yesterday and it makes so much sense to me. it also gives me a visual to work with.

each day I have 6 spoons worth of energy. each spoon represents an activity that takes about an hour. housework. appts. exercise. errands. art. and so on.

this is the lifestyle of someone with chronic fatigue and chronic pain. I am going to try this method of scheduling my days and see if I can avoid a fatigue or pain meltdown at the end of the week, which destroys my weekend.

today's spoons....

clean up house in the morning. 1 spoon.

catch up on facebook, blogs, pinterest, emails. 1 spoon.

go to ace hardware for a quart of free paint. 1 spoon
go to a local garage sale, and score some cool pieces to re-finish!

explore the irish days festival. 1 big spoon.

try to the big city to go to joanns fabrics for a bunch of supplies. 1 big spoon.

eat out and drive home. 1 spoon.

catch up on email, facebook, blogs, etc. 1 spoon.

day is done even though it is only 7:15pm.
5 spoons
2 big spoons.

result: likely will be tired tomorrow.

this is another way of what is called "pacing". this makes more sense to me....

as promised the white chocolate fudge creme recipe

my most favorite fudge crème recipe is on blog.....

http://thebigheartbakingcompany.blogspot.com


enjoy!!

the infamous donut recipe!! and special announcement.

 


a friend told me today, that if i posted my donut recipe, she knew i would hit 1,000 views this weekend!! so here it is!!
 

here is the infamous donut, along with a fun story. my friend Kathy was just about to give birth and she wanted donuts!! i eat gluten free. my maternal grandmother had celiac and died from intestinal cancer complications.  i don't have celiac, but when i eat gluten my fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue is much much much worse. my son has challenges with anxiety and is hypersensitive to many things. so, he eats gluten free with me.
 

after moving to a very small mountain town last summer, i found that there are not a lot of gluten free
baked goods options up here. during the first snow storm, i had the overwhelming desire to bake, and i have been baking ever since. i have created a couple of baking mixes, gluten free, grain free, nut free... http://thebigheartbakingcompany.blogspot.com

 

so back to donuts... i wanted to make donuts and i wanted a donut pan to bake them in. my son and i traveled nearly 100 miles to find the only 3 donut pans within the 100 mile radius!! success!!
i love a number of the gluten free blogs that have recipes. i find that i will find one and alter it to my taste. this is just what i did with the donut recipe. i found one using almond flour and one using coconut flour. i decided to try the almond flour one first. I will be making the coconut flour one this weekend.

 

if i share this with you, will you forward this blog to a friend? trying to hit 1,000 views this weekend!

 

gluten free- chocolate chip donut recipe.

1 cup of almond flour
1/4 teaspoon of sea salt
1/4 teaspoon of baking soda

4 eggs
1 teaspoon of vanilla or almond.

2 tablespoons of honey or coconut nectar.
1/2 cup of semi sweet chocolate chips

mix the dry ingredients together, mix in a separate bowl the wet ingredients. then mix the dry into the wet. mix until all smooth.

pour into your donut pan, mine is from wiltons. found it at k-mart! makes approx. 9 full size donuts.
bake at 300 for about 20 minutes or until light brown. i live at 4000 ft elevation so my times may be a bit a off if you live at sea level.

once i pulled them from the oven. i let them cool. i frosted with my white chocolate fudge crème and a multitude of sprinkles... yes, the sprinkles were gluten free!

are you asking yourself, "hey, i want the white chocolate fudge crème recipe as well".  i will post that recipe tomorrow, so you will need to come back to get it!!

so start baking!! and enjoy!!

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT!!!

IF I HIT OVER 1000 VIEWS ON MY BLOG WITH WEEKEND, I WILL LOWER MY ADVERTISING RATES TO $20 FOR ALL CATAGORIES FOR THE MONTH OF APRIL.
LIMIT 6 ADVERTISERS!! YOUR BLOG, YOUR CAUSE, YOUR BUSINESS...
SUBJECT TO MY APPROVAL! email me for more info....

 

a town i call home.

when I decided I wanted to live a simpler life, I knew I needed to move from the bay area. my choice of moving up here, a small mountain town in the sierra mountains was an easy one. my mom has had a cabin up here for years and it already felt like my second home. I already knew the grocery store, the post office, the hardware store, the thrift store, the gift store and the book store. what else could you really need? I knew the elementary school was highly regarded and had really good ratings. I knew a half dozen or so people here. so, moving here wasn't a totally new experience. it was a matter of finding a place to live, moving our "stuff" up here and starting our new life.

what I wasn't expecting was how easy it was going to be to feel like this was home. not only from a physical standpoint but from an emotional one too. this is all coming to me as I am planning a trip down to the bay area in a few weeks. yes, I am excited about seeing family and friends, the beach, trader joes and ikea, sushi! and a few other small stores, but I am already dreading the things that drove me from the bay area. I dread the drive and the traffic. I dread the intensity of the electrical current that floods this area due to the immense amount of computer use. I dread the swarms of people trying to get from point a to point b. I dread the competition of trying to make yet another dollar. I dread how I feel when I am there. I dread not being able to sleep at night due to the noise.
I dread the reality of what silicon valley has become to those of us who are not in the technical world.

I have become in rhythm with the seasons. nothing dictates how to move through the day more than the weather up here. one day can be sunny, the next it is snowing. silly me to think that the season would be more defined. in winter it is cold, it snows, it rains. but in this winter we have had temperatures from 15 degrees to 75 degrees. we have had snow, rain, hail, sun, wind, more sun.... spring is soon upon us and yet I hear we are to have a huge snow storm next week. you have to be flexible and be able to adjust your schedule to mother nature's. is that really such a bad thing? I think not. it reminds me daily how powerful nature is. we are surrounded by some of the largest and oldest trees in the area. the amount of oxygen and fresh air that surrounds us is amazing.

I have written before about "simple living". for me it is eliminating the distractions that keep you from being in the moment. when you can eliminate the rush of traffic, the noise of the environment, the air pollution, the crowds of people and the characteristics of a high tech competitive area which has created it's own bubble of life, who can finally really get to the core of what is important in your life and begin living an authentic life. thank goodness my mom found this town 15 years ago, because now I get to belong in this town. a town I call home.

to keep it simple....

creating this business is such a great lesson for me to really keep things simple. with that in mind, I will be making and selling just
ONE baking mix to start with. one that anyone who eats gluten free, grain free, nut free, paleo friendly, dairy free.... can enjoy.
it is also the highest in protein, lowest in carbs and is without white sugar. can it really be??? yes! yes! yes!.
the big heart bak...ing company proudly presents it's first baking mix.
our basic baking mix for all to enjoy.
one mix will make approx. 15 regular size cupcakes.
$5.00 or 2 for $9.
will be bringing the mixes to the bay area the first week in april. please let me know how many you would like.
in light of keeping life simple,

i am home.

yesterday started with a volunteer appreciation breakfast at my son's school. I had received this
invitation last week and thought, why am I invited? I haven't done near as much as I would
have liked to... I went anyway... the library was filled with 20 or so moms and dads who are
involved with the school is all sorts of ways. I was greeted by the principal who I have grown
to really appreciate and respect.
I sat down at a table, a very little low table with little low chairs... and realized that I knew at least
by face every single person at this table and most of the others as well. the fourth grade read us poems, the kindergarten sang us songs, it was so sweet. every teacher came by at some point to
thank us for our participation...
I had to leave early to make my 9:00 meeting in the next town down the hill. this meeting was one I had only been to once before. it is a support group for grandparents and relatives who are raising their grandchildren or relatives. I had asked if I could join. I am not a grandparent but am as old as one!!
at 53, raising a 7 year old, adopted son, I often feel like a grandparent in this community where when
you are 53, you are a grandparent not a mom of a 7 year old. well, I was welcomed with open arms to this group. even though it is quite small, the facilitator and the attendees are lovely and warm. we are all dealing with the issue of age and parenting. most of us have children with special needs; adhd, add, autism, anxiety, depression, social issues and or educational challenges. with only one doctor in this area who specializes with these issues, we have a lot to share with one another. what an amazing source of support, friendship and education. I am so glad I reached out to this group. and now am a part of this community of grandparents.
what happened yesterday wasn't just about the joy of feeling welcomed, the most profound moment I felt was when I was driving from one gathering to another.
as I walked out of my son's school, i took a big breathe of the most delicious cold fresh air, slightly tinted with fresh pine and wood stove smoke. this fresh air reminds me every day about the amount of nature we live amongst. having lived in the bay area for so long, I had forgotten how sweet fresh air tastes.
as I drove out of the parking lot from his school, I saw the lake that we spend our summers enjoying, and am reminded of the joy of our summers and the beauty of the changing seasons within this lake.
I continued on my drive and found that i am not battling traffic, waiting for traffic lights, hearing cars honking or seeing people rushing from place to place. i drove down the hill for about 14 miles and as i drove i witnessed the beauty of the changing scenery from big tall pine trees to smaller brush to vineyards. the distance between these two towns is about 1500 ft in altitude which presents itself by a change in scenery that is like a beautiful painting. i drive this drive at least 3 times a week for appointments, for knitting circle and to see friends. i love this drive!
yesterday was different. 
i was overwhelmed by the amount of beauty i live amongst.
i was grateful for having made the choice to move here.
i was filled with joy that i finally felt like i was home.
yes, i am home.
home.

re-vamped sponsorship program.

after yesterday's amazing record views on this site.... 71 in one day, in only 2 months... total 574!
i have decided to re-vamp the sponsorship idea. i want to make this super simple.

each month there will be 6 sponsorships available.
if you are a friend who wants to sponsor, then the fee is a donation of your choice.
if you are a business and want to promote your business, the fee is a minimum of $40 a month.
if you are affiliated with a non profit and want to promote the cause, the fee is a minimum of $25 a month.

you will need to notify me by the 15th of the previous month. first come, first serve. one month
commitment at a time. notify me by email at bigheartdesigns@yahoo.com.

as of march 15th, april will be open for reservations!!
payment must be received by the 25th of the previous month via
my paypal account.

your information will be highlighted at the end of every post.
the monthly group of sponsors will be highlighted on a separate post
and on my facebook page.

please email me with any questions.
thx, megan

favorite posts.

here are some of my most favorite posts....

slice of my life #3. the woman in the mirror.

slice of my life #6. with time....

#17-19 cupcake wars.

the beginning of my journey.

I am home.


enjoy!!

big news!!

I have been working on a gluten free, grain free baking mix for the past few months. I have finally created the one I desired!! and am ready to take orders!

gluten free and grain free baking mix with sweetener- i am using coconut palm sugar crystals.
$7 or 2 for $12.

gluten free and grain free baking mix without sweetener- you can add the kind you like.
$6 or 2 for $10.

email me at:

thebigheartbakingcompany@yahoo.com

your name, address and phone number.
the number and type of mixes you want to purchase.
i will send you my paypal information for payment.

my favorite recipes will be on my blog at:
http://thebigheartbakingcompany.blogspot.com


thanks!!

oh my gosh, i baked donuts!!

just baked the most yummy, gluten free, grain free- almond honey chocolate chip with white chocolate crème glaze with sprinkles!!

 thank you Kathy for having a craving for donuts!! these are for you!
more information on my baking blog.
http://thebigheartbakingcompany.blogspot.com

monday morning.... #14.

It is a beautiful Monday morning. Got my son to school on time!! Went to exercise class and worked out to the rolling stones. There is the most fun group of women who go to the 8:30 classes. Found that I really missed class this weekend and was excited about going today. Then to quilt guild where over 50 women get together every Monday to celebrate, share and announce their love for quilting. It is an amazing collaboration.
Now home with over 2.5 hours before school pick up time. Every time I drive home from school or class or guild, I am in awe of the beauty of where I now live. The air is so fresh. The trees are so big.
There is talk about a big storm that is coming in tomorrow and Wednesday. Looks like I will have shoveling exercise!! While I am loving the sunshine, it is not time for spring yet. We haven't had nearly enough rain or snow this winter.
So now, I have a recipe for donuts to try, gluten free! tons of dishes to put away, more dishes to clean, phone calls to make, then pick up from school.
This is how my Mondays roll....

how do i define "simple living for a rich life" #31.

how do I define simple living for a rich life.

simplify-
eliminate all unnecessary distractions in order to focus on the crème de la crème of life.

personal joy-
do what makes you happy; for me that is feeling fulfilled, productive, creative, spontaneous, joyful and at peace. teach this forward!

friends-
surround yourself with friends who are on the same or similar path of simplicity. sharing ideas and collaborating is wonderful!!

stuff-
purge your stuff!
if you haven't used it in over a year, can't replace it for less than $20 and forgot you had it, it is gone.
a friend of mine purged her house with the following intention. "I am moving to Africa and have to ship everything, what would I bring?"
I purged when we moved 2 years ago, then again last year and again as I have been unpacking. I have one more layer and I think I will be down to essentials!!

food-
eat as organically as possible, farm to table.

money-
determine an actual budget. then take each line item and try to reduce it as much as possible.
for example.
cell phone- by switching from sprint to a local carrier, I was able to save 50%.  Then I audit my bill monthly to make sure I am on the right plan. I just reduced my bill again by $15.
once you have determined a budget with tight numbers, who can actually figure out how much you need to earn to meet your budget. I did this years ago by writing down every single penny I spent for 3 months. and then really took a look at what I spent my money on. I was appalled by how much I was spending at starbucks!! and figured out that if I took that amount each month and saved it, by the end of the year, I could have a long weekend vacation! and more!
it is surprising how many people never have written down their expenses, but are surprised they never have any money at the end of the month. the less I have to live on, the more aware I am of what we are spending.
I am not a huge coupon clipper, rebater or sales guru, but I do look for bargains, buy a lot at the thrift stores and am careful with my funds.
I do write down what I spend on my monthly bills each month. and buy with my debit card so I can see what I have spent at the end of the month, and know where my money has gone.
knowledge is power!!!
I would rather spend money on adventures that create memories than a meal out.

education-
learn something new, teach your children by experience, volunteer your expertise to someone who can benefit from it-  be a student of the world.

I have gone from a business owner making $100,000+ to raising my family on less than $22,000 a year.
I truly believe I have a much richer life now than I ever have had. I have the time to be present, the motivation to teach my son by experience and have decreased my stress level ten fold.

As of today, this is my definition of simple living for a rich life. Likely it will change a bit as our journey continues...

sponsorship idea!

thank you all.

we hit 385 views last night. that is in just less than 2 months!! started this
blog on January 5th, 2013, six months after moving here.

Instead of the adsense route that google offers, I would rather be able to offer
your business, non-profit, blog or facebook page a chance to sponsor my blog.

I will do a write up of each sponsor and mention them at the end of each blog post.
your contribution will be a donation per view, like 2 cents to a dollar+
a view per month or a set amount each month. you determine the amount.
I will send out the stats at the end of each month, and send you an invoice
you can pay through paypal....  this is a win win for everyone!!
what do you think??? who will be the first??

starting march 5th!

thank you, slice of my life #13. march 1st.

thank you all who read my post two days ago. I happened to have the most traffic of any post/day since the first of the year. It also happened to be the day that I was writing and thinking out loud,
not in a very good mood and not feeling very hopeful. when I re-read it last night, I thought "wow, this is not what I wanted my first impression to be". so, thank you all for your understanding.

patience right now is my toughest lesson. patience for myself, number 1, patience for the process, patience for my son, patience, period. as I have said before, I am an overachiever. always have been, hope not to always be. I set these goals for myself that often are not realistic and then beat myself up when I don't reach them.

at this point in my life, I am in a place where I don't know what is realistic and what isn't. that is truly the hardest part of living with a chronic pain/fatigue condition. the unpredictability is the most disabling component.

just my quick assessment of the last 48 hours.

another day in paradise.... slice of my life #12

I felt this looming dread of sadness yesterday. Late in the afternoon, I found out about the horrific shootings in my old home town, Santa Cruz. Two detectives shot dead. Such a loss of these two wonderful people who were serving the town they both loved. I had a real hard time wrapping my head around how this even happened. The shooter never should have had a gun... but he did and he died as well. This is shaking up this small town to it's core. I woke up this morning feeling so sad.

But, I got myself dressed, my son to school, updated emails and facebook, went to yoga, went to the pharmacy, found my new tax accountant, set up an appt for tomorrow, went to the grocery store and went to my favorite thrift store where I always run into friends. Again this morning I did, my yoga teacher was there as well as the farmer's market manager. It was a good time to connect with her as I want to sell my baking mixes and amazing sweet treats this year at the market. When you live in a small town, it is so easy to run all of these errands at once. They are all within a block of each other!
No traffic, no parking problems, no lines... simple living at it's best!!

Once I got home, I was on a roll to work out a recipe for a gluten free, grain free, dairy free muffin. When I have an idea it tends to dance around in my head until I make it happen. I imagined a carrot, raisin, cinnamon, orange muffin. Well I mixed it all up and put it in the oven. Should have taken it out 2 minutes earlier... but wow!! I can't believe it worked! Yummy, moist and drizzled with an orange glaze, just a wee bit. I also used a coconut sugar instead of white sugar. Yeh! yummy. My baking mixes are becoming more and more healthy as the weeks go by. I think I am at about the healthy max right now. So with that it is time to call the department of environmental health and get certified!!

I am really working on getting my "work" life simple. I really can only work 10 hours or so a week. but in that time I need to earn $600. Crazy, I used to have $600 a goal for the day! or the week! but not the month. And this monthly goal seems even harder than it was before. So here is my equation, 10 hours a week \-$15 an hour- 4 weeks = $600. Now how hard should that be!? Believe me it has been so challenging. Of course I need to work from home if possible, have the flexibility to work when I can during the week... and not products on consignment! That is what I did most of last year, and after hours and hours and hours of work, the products may or may not sell. I am going to limit myself to the 3 stores I have now. They are only producing about $75 a month total... not really worth taking on any more. Sorry, I am really thinking out loud as I am writing. I have my March project lined up already. I have a quilt to make! And June and August are set up with teaching camp. But I am rolling into March two months behind financially already.

At the end of March, I am coming down to the bay area. I will be posting an order form for baking mixes and muffins... which I will make up here and bring down. Make sure you order early as I will have limited time to bake ahead of time.

Time to pick up my son. Until tomorrow. enjoy!!

our sunday drive... slice of my life #11

It is so easy just to stay home. there are always projects at hand to do. nice to just be lazy and relax. yesterday was a glorious sunny and clear day. I had to get out of the house!! so, I took my son and our two dogs on a sunday drive. I had read about this place that sold vintage stuff in a small town called linden. after looking at the map I realized it was only an hour plus away. so off we went.

the drive was beautiful. all of the county side was green and sparkling after last week's snow. we drove through a couple of very small towns until we reached our last turn off. no signs, no street numbers, but I thought this must be it. thank goodness another car was leaving as we came in, so I rolled down the window and they said "looking for Nicole?" "yes, I am", "just down this lane,  you will find her". oh good, I didn't get us lost!! ahead of us was this old barn... and out of the side door,
Nicole walked towards us. I told her who I was and she welcomed us in...

I wish I had taken pictures, sorry all. she has converted her side barn where as a child she raised show pigs, into a quaint country vintage shop. I was in heaven!! I was looking for a door to use as a headboard in my room. I managed to find about a dozen pieces that I fell in love with. the hardest part was to narrow down what I could fit in my car to take home. this is what fit!!

1. a very old distressed full size and very heavy door with an amazing iron lock.
2. a pre-pattened kerosene stove in great condition!!
3. a black distressed clock.
4. a side table that is fabulous.
5. an old light fixture that I am going to use as a candle holder.
6. a distressed with burlap picture board.

you see, I have this 10x12 barn that I had built last fall on my property. I think it is going to be an art barn/reading room/vintage goodies barn... I have a vision of how I want it to look... it still needs painting inside and out. needs a front step and a small porch. this is my major spring project. I haven't done anything yet to my backyard of 1/2 acre... and this is one of the focal point. and as you can see, I am chomping at the bit to start decorating it.

so what I left behind.... was an old screen door, a rusted brass bed set, a vintage bathtub, the kind you see in the western movies, a dresser with a mirror that she had restored beautifully and a few other accessories...

I will be posting pictures of my finds shortly.

oh what a fun day!! and to find such a nice new friend on the other end of our sunday country drive.
the drive home was just as beautiful. I went home the other way around. through some amazing farm property, got lost for a brief moment but got back on track quickly. it was so fun to explore this new area and discover such treasures!

planning next Sunday's drive already!! going in the opposite direction unless the treasures I left behind are calling me name!!

the primitive barn, linden, California.
Nicole has a facebook page and an etsy site.

keep it simple.... something special #30

i saw this wonderful post on facebook last week that couldn't explain what i mean by living simply better.

free your heart from hatred.
free your mind from worries.
live simply.
give more.
expect less.

the live simply part for me means.

reduce of the distractions in your life that
prevent you from living authentically.

surround yourself with friends
that make you happy.

do what you love and don't
be attached to the outcomes.

make the best decisions you can with
the information you have.

take care of mother earth.

be healthy. be happy. be flexible.

keep it simple.

something special, #29

my most favorite place to shop is our local thrift store that benefits the local humane society. it is the most happening shop in town. there are so many vacation rentals up here. and it seems that someone is either selling or downsizing weekly. that means a lot of really cool stuff ends up in the thrift store. my son and I go at least twice a week. we find all sorts of clothing, especially cold weather clothing for next to nothing, he rescues a stuffed animal weekly and gives it a better home than at the store and the most awesome household stuff!!
so, the "stuff" is repurposed at the store and not thrown in the dump, we are able to find all sorts of treasures for next to nothing, and our money helps a local charity that serves homeless animals.
to me that is a clear win win win.
we end up spending very little each month of all sorts of treasures!! and feel really good giving them our business!!

something special, just a thought #28.

just read an amazing article about a family in Germany that lives without money. mostly trade and barter, they have an excess of food and housing right now.
challenge thought.... how little money could you live on?
what could you trade or barter? what would your life look
like if money wasn't trapping you?
being on a fixed income has allowed me to visualize the kind of life I want for myself and my family, and figure out how to make it happen within my financial restraints. we moved to an area where housing is so much more reasonable. I reviewed every one of my bills and figured out if I could lower it. and most importantly figured out my budget in order to stay within my money. any extra money is for travel, extras for the house and so on. I truly believe that my life is so much richer now, then when I earned a lot more but had no time or energy to enjoy it. just a thought.

A slice of my life #10.

I have tended to be someone who has a lot of ideas, toss them around, visualize them, talk about them and see what really makes me excited and happy. When one of these ideas starts to create a life of it's own and doesn't feel like a runaway train... I am on to something good. This something good right now is The Big Heart Baking Company. I just posted 3 new posts on it's blogsite. thebigheartbakingcompany.blogspot.com to update what's happening....
My challenge is to keep it manageable. This is the first time I am starting a business without the goal of how big can I make this, how much money can I make but rather will this make me happy, will I be able to do this physically, how do I need to adapt my plan to meet my needs, can I work this within the limitations I have physically and emotionally, is it going to be worth my time and energy to do this... I am physically able to work about 12 hours a week. is this going to be enough?
It doesn't surprise me that this challenge is on my plate. I am learning all over again how to take care of myself and to prioritize my energy. I am no good to anyone, especially my son, if I over do it. I am learning that while I love being a mom, I need something to call my own. This just might be it.
So with firm boundaries, a clear plan and the willingness to try to do this differently... I am moving forward. Only time will tell.

new posts on the big heart baking company blog.

hi all.

i just posted 3 new posts on the big heart baking company blog.

thebigheartbakingcompany.blogspot.com

1. in the beginning.
2. great news!
3. recipe #1 almond macaroon cake.

enjoy the yumminess!

slice of my life #9.

wrote this 5 days ago...

next posts are:
slice of my life 9
baking company 3
something special 28

as you can see, I needed to figure out where I was... ready for slice of my life #9, the big heart baking company #3 and something special #28+. being that it is February 14th, which means we are at day 45 into the new year and I am only at 37 in my total posts... I have some catching up to do.

earlier this week, I felt so much free floating anxiety... couldn't really pinpoint it, but finally realized that I hadn't written in over a week. I am realizing just how important it is to write everyday.
it is the one activity that grounds me while amongst the daily chaos of life. I am someone who has always had tons of ideas, lots of creativity, unrealistic expectations of myself and those around me and as this overachieving person, I begin to spin out of control when I don't ground myself. yes, likely adhd, never have been diagnosed but as I am reading more and more about it, I sure do have a lot of the tendencies... my favorite is to hyper focus. getting to a point where I am so absorbed in what I am doing that the world around me disappears and I am just in the moment. love that!! and yes, I just burned the pizza because I am focused on writing...

in the past, getting myself grounded meant my body did it for me; break an ankle, break a foot, throw a blood clot... you get the picture. my challenge now is to keep myself grounded while in the midst of my life so that I can keep my body from grounded me. when you live with a chronic pain/fatigue condition, illness, whatever you want to call it, the delicate balance of being productive and staying grounded and rested is a daily challenge. often feels like walking a tightrope without a balance bar. all it takes is a slight breeze and I tip over...

being that i have had 7 hours of iep meetings for my son in the last two days, i am tipped over. thank goodness my mom is coming up tomorrow. hopefully i will be napping all weekend.

stay tuned....

a slice of my life #8, the big heart baking co. #2

greetings.

so, I got my son to school this morning, filled up the car with gas, went to the grocery store for a few things, battled with sprint, and now am sitting in my very comfortable perch writing... trying to decide if I should go to exercise class. haven't been in two weeks, and now it is a possibility... hoping that I am not trying to do too much, but at the same time really needing to stretch.
yesterday, my first try of chocolate cake using my baking mix was a bust. way too dry. could have cooked too long or should have added more wet to compensate for the cocoa powder. the best batch I have made up I added sweet potato and banana to. so I am going to make this up again and add some applesauce to it. other than a little dry, it was really good. I would love to perfect a chocolate version by using my basic baking mix. then I would have a "vanilla" and a "chocolate" versions. looks like the mix is going to cost about $6.00. betty crocker is $5-5.50 and only makes up 12 cupcakes. mine a bit more will make 16-24 cupcakes. a much better value. and by using almond flour instead of all rice flour, it is higher in protein and lower in carbs. I will report in how today's version turns out.
as I am researching recipes, creating baking mixes and in awe of very detailed cake decorating.... I think my next "career" really needs to be one of a pastry chef. not one that goes out and works 40+ hours, but one who works from home creating and sharing...
if only I knew how to get paid doing this? think I can sell 150 baking mixes to friends and family every month?? that would do it!
ok. I am putting this in my draft folder and going to class. should be interesting...
well it is nearly 4 hours later. I went to class and it had been cancelled. our instructor now has the flu. decided to work the circuit for 15minutes and stretch for another 10 minutes. came home and have napped for nearly 3 hours. better than nothing, right??
kept thinking while I was napping..... if I took 6 of my dry muffin cakes, crumbled them all up, added some butter... could I turn them into a pie crust??

simple dinners. # 25-27

the hardest part of my day is between 3-6pm. of course this is the time that the most important things of the day need to happen; dinner, homework, bath and getting ready for bed. dinners are always daunting for me. I would love to actually cook a good healthy meal each day, but that doesn't always happen. I have a couple of go to dinners when I am not feeling good and haven't loaded up the crockpot in the morning.

1. we love corn tortillas. so in my large skillet i layer a corn tortilla, some mozzarella cheese, some turkey breast and another tortilla. this is our new version of a grilled cheese sandwich. super easy to make and my son loves it. add some baby carrots for vegetables... and it is a done deal.

2. my version of the above is to skip the meat, add a bit more cheese and put in a dollop of pesto sauce. unbelievable! so yummy. yes, i add lots of fresh baby carrots on my plate as well.

3. when i don't want something hot, i slice tomatoes, fresh mozzarella cheese and toast some rice bread with pesto. make into little sandwiches... yummmmmy.

i seem to be hooked on pesto at the moment. found this store bought version that is super yummy. will be planting basil to make my own this summer. who knows what whim i will be on next. tune in to find out!!

slice of life #7.

well it has been almost a week since I have written. clearly this flu/fibromyalgia flare has knocked me on my butt. all I want to do is sleep. and have been 12-14 hours a day. I would even more if I didn't have to be "mom" as well. my dear son was so wonderful this weekend. he told me I could lay in bed and rest and he would bring his toys in to my room to play with. we played hours of legos... watched too much foodnetwork, and the superbowl. I actually taught him how to play football. gosh those years of being a cheerleader in college really paid off this weekend!!
I have baked, cooked, sewn, quilted, read or knit in the past week. that really tells you how lousy I have been feeling. our alarm clock didn't go off this morning so it was a quick get out of bed day. once we was off to carpool I went back to sleep. again not getting up until 11ish.
I was determined to bake a chocolate cake. I know that sounds really funny, but it has been dancing in my head and it needed to be done. I took my basic baking mix and added cocoa powder to it. we will see how it does. the heart shaped cupcakes are in the oven as I write.
I have been thinking a lot about how I am going to make the small amount of money I need to each month to supplement my disability. years ago when I ran my wedding gown design business, I would brainstorm how I was going to make $10,000 a month... now I just am trying to figure out how to make $400-800 a month. in the design days, that amount would be what I should be making in a day, not a month. and this amount seems as hard to make as the $10.000 was years ago.
of course, I have a ton of ideas. that is what I do best, come up with ideas. but the problem becomes in the making it happen side. the unpredictability of my fibromyalgia really squashes so many of my ideas. one day I think it is brilliant, then next I wonder what was I thinking. if it was possible to make $2.00 for each view of my blog, I would be set. this is what I can really do on a sustainable basis. but how on earth do I tie this in to income. "google" was already denied adsense for my blog. likely because it is so new, and small. what feels right for me right now, is to write. what a great sentence that is. as well as come up with new recipes for my baking mix. I don't want to go commercial with it, so selling the mix to friends and family has it's limits.
yes, I sew.... but sewing has been really daunting lately. my hands go numb so quickly and my back goes into spasms so quickly. I have a great opportunity to make dog harnesses... just need to get ink for my printer and get to it. my plan is to get out tomorrow to stretch class and to get ink. oh yeh!!
so time will tell how long I am in this fatigue funk... hopefully it will lift soon. I does give me time to
reflect on all the small things I am grateful for. that in itself is rewarding. time to take out my 16 heart shaped cocoa cupcakes. hope they turned out. the kitchen at least smells wonderful!!

the big heart baking company #1.

after writing my last "slice of life" #6, i was all juiced up to move forward on my baking mix idea. my design business has been called "big heart designs" for many years. it seemed only natural to call this venture "the big heart baking company", i have wanted to open a bakery called "big heart bakery", but that will have to wait for another lifetime. vistaprint was offering free business cards thru today, so i hopped on their site and created a quick free card.

 

 

discovered that vistaprint also prints business size labels... decided i wanted a label that would state the ingredients as well as the location to direct you to the recipes for the baking mix.

 

 

thought this was just perfect for getting started. both should be to me in 10 days or so. in the meantime, i am coming up with the first 5 recipes to taste test! so far these are the contenders:

 

1. almond cake with smash berry sauce.

2. citrus shortbread with lemon curd.

3. banana muffin with a smidge of fudge.

4. chocolate torte with almond crème.

5. peanut butter cupcake with fudge filling

and peanut butter frosting.

 

your thoughts??

 

slice of my life #6, with time to think... the beginning of the big heart baking company.

one of the blessings of being sick is that there is so much time to just think, ponder, create in your mind.
I spent some of my downtime reviewing in my mind this blog. I realize how important it is to me. I am someone who needs a purpose and goals. so to set the goal of at least one "something special" or "slice of my life" everyday, but giving myself the cushion on not having to post everyday. some days will  have more than one I am working on being kinder to myself. this has given me permission to be creative, focus on the moment and share slices of my life with others. I know that I lead a out of the box life, and hope that someone, someday will be inspired by what I have to say.
that in itself gives me a purpose.
I have spent the last month baking and cooking like a fiend. it is winter and that is what I am longing to do. I have wanted to fill the house with wonderful smells of the kitchen, keep the house warm with the fire and oven and make all sorts of comforting food that warms our bellies.
as someone who sees everything as a business opportunity, I dreamed of having a bakery, all gluten free. where I could bake all my goodies; cupcakes, cakes, muffins and more... where I could be creative all day long, where I could create this meeting place where folks could come and gather, where kids would drool over the variety of cupcakes and where I knew that everything baked was baked with love. sounds like a wonderful place and one that is actually needed in this small town. but when I sat back and really had time to ponder this idea, I realized that I can no longer attempt such a great idea. I just don't have the physical stamina for this kind of goal. it makes me sad and frustrated that i cannot make this come to fruition. i am not one to give up, but to find a different way of making things work. so this is how i retranslated this idea.
what if i packaged and marketed the gluten free baking mix i have created? what if instead of having to do all the baking, i could come up with new recipes for this baking mix and could share them? what if others could still enjoy these yummy delicious baked treats without me having to have a storefront? what if i could really just do this a few hours a week, instead of a 60 hour week? what if this could supplement my disability income? what if i could really do what i enjoy best, the creating, the coming up with new recipes, the marketing... without the work that taxes me physically? what a concept!!
what i do best is to take an idea and spin it out to the future to see what it could look like, then reel it back in to see the steps that it would have to take to be successful.
this idea seemed pretty basic to me. i already have the baking mix recipe, need to see what options there are for buying gluten free flours in bulk, price out the baking mix to see what the unit cost is,
determine what my price would be, see if it is possible to wholesale or keep just as a retail product, determine what packaging is necessary and where i can find it and write this all down!!! so it doesn't dance in my head while i am trying to sleep...
this is a fairly low cost investment idea. i am going to make up 12 units of baking mix, make up 6 in different recipes and ask a group of moms and kids to taste test them for me, and send out 6 to friends with a recipe to try and have them send me their comments.
and fine tune from there.
so, i have the baking mix recipe, i have the idea for packaging, i have my taste testing team, i have a few friends already to send samples to, and now i have to come up with my 6 most favorite
recipes to taste test. that is what i will be doing this weekend.
seems like this idea is taking shape. follow my journey on how this unfolds. i will start a new thread on this blog called "the big heart baking company" so you can follow along...
so here is today, i feel somewhat better, my fingers are writing, my head is a little clearer and it is a beautiful sunny cold day in the  mountains!

slice of my life #5.

oh my goodness, i think i have finally surfaced from this crazy flu. i had the sniffles all of last week, but it went into full blown flu last sunday. fever, stuffed up head, cold... seems that there are two flus going around right now. one is the throw up/stomach yucky flu and the other is this cold like flu. well, i am glad at least i got this one and not the other. i have spent the last 4 days either asleep, resting, or trying to keep the essential daily activities afloat. nothing is harder than being sick and having to be a mom at the same time. no one to tag team with... my son has been a champ, but i am afraid we have overdosed on screen time this week.
the extra special add on is that when ever i am sick, my fibromyalgia flares big time. i have been exceptionally tired, achy and depressed. i know what to do for myself; sleep, sleep, sleep, hydrate, eat and repeat. so now on day 5, i am feeling somewhat better. feeling inspired to write, maybe even cook. life is getting better. hopefully by the weekend, i will be back to my normal.

so far, i am thrilled.

days of blogging- 23
number of posts- 19/ 6 drafts
number of something special- 24
slices of life- 4
page views- 228

what I have discovered so far:

I love writing.
I love creating and sharing recipes.
I love sharing my favorite books.
I can't wait to take more pictures.

I am finding that my creativity is seasonal. In winter, all I want to do is bake and cook.
I will love sharing my favorite spring gardening ideas.
I will love sharing my favorite summer crafts.
I will love sharing my favorite fall gift making and celebration ideas.

I love writing about the challenges of my fibromyalgia. It is so therapeutic and healing for me.

When it comes to baking...
I don't want to start a full service bakery, don't have the energy.
I want to create gluten free baking mixes along with a recipe ideas for those who bake gluten free and for those who don't but would love super tasty, higher protein, lower carb baking mixes.

My hands are becoming numb... so that is it for now. More later.

#20-24 my favorite books from our bookclub

 

provence cure for the brokenhearted by bridget asher.

the back of the book review-
"brokenhearted and still mourning the loss of her husband, heidi travels with abbot, her obsessive-compulsive seven-year-old-son, and charlotte, her jaded sixteen-year-old-niece, to the small village of puyloubier in the south of france, where a crumbling stone house ay be responsible for mending hearts since before world war 2. there, charlotte confesses a shocking secret, and heidi learns the truth of her mother's lost summer when heidi was a child. as three generations collide with one another, with the neighbor who seems to know all of their family skeletons, and with an enigmatic frenchman, heidi, charlotte, and abbot journey through love, loss and laughter amid the vineyards, warm winds, and delicious food of provence. can the magic of the house heal heidi's heart, too?"

 I loved this book. I was transported into the lives of these characters. I felt like I had been to the south of france and back. I made me want to get on a plane and travel to france, now!! A good read for a stormy weekend.

*********************************************

nothing daunted by dorothy wickenden.

the back of the book review-
in the summer of 1916, dorothy woodruff and rosamond underwood, bored by society luncheons, charity work and the effete men who courted them, left their families in auburn, new york to teach school in the wilds of northwestern colorado. they lived with a  family of homesteaders in the elkhead mountains and rose to school on horseback, often in blinding blizzards..... nearly a hundred years later, dorothy wickenden, the granddaughter of dorothy woodruff, found the teachers' buoyant letters home, which captured the voices of the pioneer women, the children, and other unforgettable people the women got to know. in reconstructing their journey, wickenden has created na exhilarating saga about two intrepid women and the "settling up of the west."

 another great read. i always had a such a hard time learning history growing up. i have learned that my comprehension of history is greatly underdeveloped. this book read like a movie to me. I was transported into their time and could visually watch their story. i love books about strong women who defy society's expectations. this book was wonderful. I would strongly recommend this book to teachers in particular.

********************************************

the orchid house by lucinda riley
"spanning from the 1930-'s to the present day, from the wharton park estate in england to thailand, this sweeping novel tells athe tale of a concert pianist and the aristocratic crawford family, whose shocking secreats are revealed, leading to devastating consequences." review on the back.

simply loved this book. as you are finding out about me, i love to be transported into the book like it is playing out like a movie in my head. this book took me to england during many generations. i  felt like i was right there as a character of this novel. again a great read.

****************************************

 

 park lane by frances osborne.

 

written by the author of the bolter,

this book is "gripping... it captures brilliantly the outbreak of war and the changing attitudes towards women" writes - booksellers' choice, the bookseller.

 

 

again, i learned an amazing amount about the history of women's rights. the graphic details of what the prominent women in the women's movement did to promote women's rights was incredible.

a history in words that once again transported me into their world.

this is also a great read.

 

********************

 

I love my book group. it is a small group of women who meet once a month to chat about the chosen book. I often bring

baked goodies for them to enjoy and review!

we have read a couple others that I will post a bit later.

 

all of these books were chosen by my book group and our fearless leader, kym- co-owner of maisie blue in murphys california.

feel free to call her to order any of these books.

209-728-8261 maisieblue.wordpress.com

 

enjoy being transported into history~~