well it has been almost a week since I have written. clearly this flu/fibromyalgia flare has knocked me on my butt. all I want to do is sleep. and have been 12-14 hours a day. I would even more if I didn't have to be "mom" as well. my dear son was so wonderful this weekend. he told me I could lay in bed and rest and he would bring his toys in to my room to play with. we played hours of legos... watched too much foodnetwork, and the superbowl. I actually taught him how to play football. gosh those years of being a cheerleader in college really paid off this weekend!!
I have baked, cooked, sewn, quilted, read or knit in the past week. that really tells you how lousy I have been feeling. our alarm clock didn't go off this morning so it was a quick get out of bed day. once we was off to carpool I went back to sleep. again not getting up until 11ish.
I was determined to bake a chocolate cake. I know that sounds really funny, but it has been dancing in my head and it needed to be done. I took my basic baking mix and added cocoa powder to it. we will see how it does. the heart shaped cupcakes are in the oven as I write.
I have been thinking a lot about how I am going to make the small amount of money I need to each month to supplement my disability. years ago when I ran my wedding gown design business, I would brainstorm how I was going to make $10,000 a month... now I just am trying to figure out how to make $400-800 a month. in the design days, that amount would be what I should be making in a day, not a month. and this amount seems as hard to make as the $10.000 was years ago.
of course, I have a ton of ideas. that is what I do best, come up with ideas. but the problem becomes in the making it happen side. the unpredictability of my fibromyalgia really squashes so many of my ideas. one day I think it is brilliant, then next I wonder what was I thinking. if it was possible to make $2.00 for each view of my blog, I would be set. this is what I can really do on a sustainable basis. but how on earth do I tie this in to income. "google" was already denied adsense for my blog. likely because it is so new, and small. what feels right for me right now, is to write. what a great sentence that is. as well as come up with new recipes for my baking mix. I don't want to go commercial with it, so selling the mix to friends and family has it's limits.
yes, I sew.... but sewing has been really daunting lately. my hands go numb so quickly and my back goes into spasms so quickly. I have a great opportunity to make dog harnesses... just need to get ink for my printer and get to it. my plan is to get out tomorrow to stretch class and to get ink. oh yeh!!
so time will tell how long I am in this fatigue funk... hopefully it will lift soon. I does give me time to
reflect on all the small things I am grateful for. that in itself is rewarding. time to take out my 16 heart shaped cocoa cupcakes. hope they turned out. the kitchen at least smells wonderful!!
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