a slice of my life #2.

good morning. it is a beautiful sunny and very cold morning.

this past Thursday, I treated myself to 4 hours of a handywoman's assistance in helping me finish projects. finally got the bathroom finished. I had about 3 sq feet that still needed painting. but it was up high and painting over my head is not at all comfortable for me. she changed the light bulb in the hallway. not a big deal, I know. but I hadn't done it for 6 months. very low on my to do list. she also finished painting the hall way and got to cabinet knobs fixed for me. huge success!!! money well spent. got to know her better, she is also our pto president. I knew I wanted to get to know her when I saw that she drove a vintage orange vw camper bus. so way cool!!
crossing off items on my "finish the house to do list" felt so wonderful!! p.s. she is coming back next week!!

it is very hard for me to ask for help. I am a do it myself kind of gal. stubbornly independent. but as I am finding even up here in the mountains, I have limited energy. so hard for me to admit. I use to work 12-16 hours a day. 5-7 days a week. one down day a week and I could recharge.  now my fibromyalgia related exhaustion/ fatigue creeps up on me so much earlier in the day. I am up at 7am, unheard of for me, but I don't the power to change the start time at school! lol!! If all I am doing is taking wm to school, gently exercising 30-1hr, doing about 2 hours of "stuff", therapy appt, or knitting circle, or quilting guild, or cooking/baking, or writing, or sewing, or running errands then a bit of housework, picking up wm at 2pm... I am out of energy by 4ish. pushing thru to get homework done, dinner on the table, wm's night routine, we are in bed by 7pm. 6.30 is more my speed. we read in bed and watch a bit of tv, always the food network!! yes, my son loves to watch the cooking competition shows as I do.  as he was eating my new favorite cake recipe, he said to me "mommy, if you were on "chopped", you would win!!" that sure did warm my heart!!. we are both asleep between 7.30-9. that is my day. add more to that and I am likely to be overly tired the next day. then, I have to slow down even more, catch up on more sleep to get back on track.

the acceptance of this schedule is very hard for me. I am trying to be kinder and gentler to myself... ask for help when needed... know I just cannot do what I did years ago.... and be so grateful that I get to stop and smell the roses, enjoy life in a slower and deliberate way and can become more mindful not mind full.

we are going to gently enjoy this day!